Looking back

I spent a little while this past weekend looking through some old photos of myself, and then my photos from just before the surgery, and I couldn't help but to cry.

This was my 'before' photo. The photo that I took in anticipation of all the progress ahead, the promise of things to come. At the time I knew it was bad, but it is only now that I am looking back, that I see clearly how big I was.

Part of me never wants to show this photo, and of course it's the internet, it could go anywhere. But I am sharing it because someone might be out there and is struggling with making this decision. It is one of the hardest things I have done. But by far, it has also been the best thing that i have done for myself.

This was me 28/08/12

I didn't know I was that big.

Now I look like this.

19/02/14

I'm not a supermodel. I'm not skinny. But I am healthy, fit and strong. I like buying and wearing clothes. I am happy. I thank God that I was able to have the surgery and live the life that I now lead.